he was(delete)

Oh, long long time age, a little boy found his ture love.
Across the ground.
Beyond the mountain.
And she was there ──The sea. The most mysterious woman. The every man's Lover.
So, Little Boy pushed the door and went away by himself. He was going to find his love, and leave his homeland behind.


".........then that was your story?"
"Yeah. Yep. Romantic, isn't it sir?"
"Well," he smiled. "I wasn't surprised to hear this story from you."

標籤： 布幕之後。

過去，不是很遙遠的過去，有個年輕人失去了他的戀人。
並不是那種緩慢綿長的失去，而是突如其來，令人措手不及的那種。某一天的午後，無異於昔往的午後，那個女孩便躺在了那條寬大的水溝旁。她微微卷曲的金色長髮浮載於淺流上，面容靠在粗糙的水泥地上，身體縮成一團，四肢散亂、平順卻又點怪異地擺著。那些暗紅的血慢慢從她身下滲出，並不多，散逸在水裡卻成了很醒目的一道鮮紅長絲，蜿蜒地不停，流去。
那天年輕人就在岸邊。他是聽到召喚而前來，望見他的戀人躺在那裡、沐浴在冷清的陽光中，於是他看著，蹲了下去，用雙手緊緊圈住了自己。但他的頭始終沒有低下，他的雙眼直視著對方癱軟的身子，溫柔地不忍眨眼。
那個年輕人是

至此斷章。我寫不出來。

標籤： 布幕之後。

He ran. He ran through the path hiding in the forest that he’s kept it as his own secret. He didn’t look back even. His heartbeat hurt himself and his sweat cried him to hurry and he just ran, as fast as possible.
The people would come soon after him, and so would their fire. Then there was not any moment left for him. He knew that so he burned the tears by the heat from the air.

When he ran into the small valley, he saw the girl sitting there in these poppies as usual. Then the way she eyed him was misting liked it was always. It made him doubt. It made all the things liked right and no nightmare anymore. It made all the fire just liked his bad dream.
But the fire lit the midnight sky telling him that his world was burning down and so was he if he didn’t start to run then.
‘They’re coming. We, we must go. Follow me, I know the way… I…’ He bit his lip, and he felt the blood heated his throat. The girl kept looking at him like she didn’t know what he was talking about at all.
‘Who? What? Why we have to go?’ She said, slowly, with her light voice. He noticed that her hair in the fire-light would show a color which like the torch lighting under the sea. Don’t know how and why, the view brought something here and made him felt illusory, unnatural, insane and despair, but no even fear and sadness.
‘Because…’ Words were getting hard and hard to say. Fire let the wet go away from the air, and he felt thirsty. ‘Because their fire will burn here.’
After he said, the report bombed above their heads and the light brighted the valley. He tried to call her name, but then he remembered that he didn’t even know her name puzzling.
That was the first time her pale face be full of wavering terror.
At the first second he guessed that just a mistaken impression but her thin drowned voice cut cross the bomb and told him that how true everything was.
‘Can’t stop them?’
‘No, I can’t.’
He wanted to hit himself when he faced her sadly weakness and he couldn’t do anything for her.
‘But, but I know how to hide and I know the way goes to the town. I can protect you, I can, I can take you away.’ With his saying, he saw that the shine in her eyes became darker and darker. Fears climbed upon his root of the tongue and ran up to the nose and eyes. He heard his voice shaking. He almost forgot to say the heaviest words.
‘Please go with me, won’t you?’

As soon as she shook her head slowly but steadily, the fire came closer and closer and reded all his views ate up her body. His eyes was blinded by the heat, and he smelled the poppies burnt. He started shouting and shaking his hands, but he caught nothing. He knew that guys would burn down these poppies, he knew they want to kill his helpless sick homeland.

Suddenly, he found what name is that girl’s.
He found the poppy-color eyes the girl has, he found all the midnight date in the poppies, he found the story of her and her bunt ground, he found all the things he blinded to in the memories between them.

He cried, cried for his stupid, cried for his whole world’s death.
There was nothing left but himself, so he turned back and ran, closing his hurt eyes and feeling the heat smelling the scent, finding the exit-way.
He ran.



100-74

標籤： 布幕之後。

灰白的空氣，風輕輕打亂了乾癟的蘆葦，淺淺的水那樣清又那樣輕地敲擊著石頭，激出細細潺潺的聲響。河面那個倒影眼神曖曖辨不出色彩，長又密的瀏海擋住了上方冷然的陽光，陷在淡淡陰影中的半張臉，好像，似乎，氳噙著晦澀。於是一圈圈的波紋打亂了這令人鬱悶的畫面，打起漣漪的石子落在河床上時的鈍痛是如此響亮。
橋上的少年收回目光撇過頭。
「你不要那樣看我。知不知道你這模樣很讓人厭煩？」風微微打散劉海，從髮絲的空隙間洩出的目光相當模糊不清。他無法理解對方的語言，涵義扼殺在表面的不耐裡，他試都沒試便放棄解讀。(拐彎抹角，不干不脆曖昧不明無聊瑣碎，又窮極心力，多累。要打啞謎隨他去，但他懶得去思考答案。)
「你根本什麼都不懂。」回敬更加不耐煩的聲音，他的目光再度落回大溝裡清澈出奇的淺流。
跟著，對方的倒影急促地踱進水面，硬生生擠入他的視線。
「你什麼都不說，你以為我能懂些什麼？」
他們的身影隨著水流顫抖著，他盯著橋下那雙依舊模糊卻因喪氣的憤怒而明亮的目光，發現他們頭頂的天空是那麼廣那麼高那麼蒼茫，那麼黯淡。

標籤： 布幕之後。

Time runs, someone follow, someone stay,
and will never move again,
The ghosts won't come,
and we won't froget them still,
so we will go to find,
till we see them and bring them back to our life again.

標籤： 布幕之後。

‘Welcome to China, Mr. Isaac. I will be your guide and interpreter in these days you stay here.’ That’s the age we first met. Though I wasn’t use to see Asian faces then, I could looked out how different between he and the other Chinese. While he talked to me, his almond eyes were narrow, so I wasn’t sure his eyes were black or not, maybe they just as brown as this guys stayed in Italy waiting for me finish the “holiday”. But I appreciate his eyesight, which I also didn’t like.
‘My name is Hu Xiaoying.’ said he, smiling. ‘You can call me Xiaoying.’
‘So… is there a Tiger Conservation Center?’ He drove me to our own mountain from public airport by himself. ‘On the surface, yes, it is. But we smuggle tigers and some other felines privately.’
We crossed many bridges in the way. Every time I looked down, there was always a dark river waiting for my eyes. Dark and dirty and turbid.
‘Tigers? It that a hot market? Johnson never tell me the business of China.’
‘As I guess, sir. This work is not that important in all our businesses. I think you team in center seldom hear about what we do, and Boss also seldom care about our work by himself.’
‘In this way you said, it sounds like I just come to the Orient Edge of Bloc, eh?’
‘May be right, Mr. Isaac.’ He smiled, again.


‘Can you show me the information of all your businesses here?’ the room for me there was not bad, nothing I wanted to nit-pick, except it was too smaller than the one in Italy. ‘Yes, Mr. Isaac. But I remember you are being on holiday, or I got wrong?’
‘Yep, maybe that is what they said. But go on holiday? Me? Don’t keep act like you didn’t know at all, Xiaoying, I don’t like to see you do so.’
‘Yes, Mr. Isaac. But it wasn’t Boss ask you to go to a holiday in our villa?’
‘John has known that I won’t just be on a holiday. Maybe he really wanted me to take a rest, however it wouldn’t be the only purpose. Anyway, I thought he neglect here too much, and so did he, probable. I think that is why he asked me to have a holiday here.’ I noticed everything was ready when I arrived here; the servants had arranged for my things, and Xiaoying gave me a tea, black tea, though I didn’t remember he ever went away from me.
‘I understood, sir, I will arrange. After your dinner. Which one you would like to try better? Chinese or Italian?’ I drank a little tea, thanks to its taste, I knew that the next time I should try something else, such as coke or coffee. ‘Humm…do you have American fast food?’
‘No, but we will get some before dinner time, of course.’
‘Well, if I were you, I will get more than ever. You had better remember this: I like to eat fast food recently. Oh, and this, I don’t like your manner of speaking.’
‘Yes, Mr. Isaac. I will improve.’ He smiling, as he always kept do so, quite unhurriedly. That’s was which I didn’t like, too.


‘Mr. Isaac, we can visit the Conservation Center first today, and the information is ready. Do you wand to see it right now?’ The next day, Xiaoying knocked my room door when I was eating the burger for breakfast, which was much better their black tea. However I didn’t like their working manner still, ‘cause people in Italy never let me wait for anything. But I thought that just because they couldn’t know who I am really clearly, as Xiaoying said, here just liked the Edge. ‘No, but put them on my office desk. I will see them later.’
‘Yes, Mr. Isaac.’
‘Oh, and why you said we will see the Conservation Center first, why not about the factory? I remember I told you I want to see factories today, didn’t I ?’
‘Yes, sir, you did. But I am afraid that we can’t visit factories that soon. There are some complicated procedures, you know, we should disguise ourselves as a legal organization on the surface. And I think if you want to know our work, Conservation Center is a start better than factories.’
I raised my eyebrows. You think, eh?
‘Fine. But how soon we can visit the factory? I won’t have a pretty long holiday as you may think.’
‘As soon as possible, sir.’
I heard he closed the door, they opened the air conditioners in those rooms for me, but I notice they didn’t do so for themselves. The monsoon of Asia, huh? I thought even though they do such things for me, I wouldn’t like Chinese still. Especially the kind which use to smiling with narrowed their almond eyes.


Sometimes I understood why I don’t like those Asian quiet distinctly, such the time I first saw the real Chinese chess. This age I was finding Xiaoying. That was a bad behavior they had the impudence to let me find my own interpreter by myself especially they weren’t have the conditioners in everywhere, maybe, I didn’t know what way is they use to serve for their chief, but anyhow, that was not my way, and I was the boss to everyone except Johnson so they should worked in this way I use to do, not theirs.
When I found him, he was playing the chess with other guy in his own place, which was very difficult to find out.
Didn’t need any explanation, he knew I was in a bad mood even I didn’t shout until then. ‘Ha, you are here, I just guess is everyone working outdoor, how a hard-working nation! So, what are you doing here while I was finding you form door to door? Playing a Chinese chess?’
‘I’m so sorry, Mr. Isaac, that’s our fault. If you don’t mind, the next time you want to find me, you can cell the switchboard in your room and they will ask me to meet you.’
‘Uh-huh, but next time I hope you will tell me about the phone first. Now that I ‘m here, so why don’t I see you play the game? I never see people play the real Chinese chess before.’ I sat down beside them, the other guy looked a little nervous about my appearance. I guessed I didn’t see him before then, but obviously, he knew me. ‘Don’t be afraid, I won’t eat you.’ Said I, smiling, to the guy.
‘Sorry sir, but he didn’t learn English so he can’t know what we are talking about.’ said Xiaoying.
‘That’s okay, you’re my interpreter, remember?’ I took the cap of coffee on the desk in front of me, his or the other’s, it doesn’t matter, I didn’t mind it, they didn’t have a conditioner in his room and I couldn’t stand any longer like kept to wait for my own cap.
‘Yes, sir. And, do I have this honour to play a game with you?’
‘Me? I didn’t ever play Chinese chess you known that, still more you have had a mate already, isn’t he?’
‘You mean he?’ smiled him, and I saw the guy looked more nervous like he could guess what we said. ‘He’s also not really good at playing Chinese chess, I just caught someone wasn’t working then at will. So, how about you? Everything has the first, Mr. Isaac.’
‘Well, maybe I can try. “Everything has the first”, good saying.’
I admitted that it was not a really difficult game, even I didn’t know what normality the game is, however I also couldn’t ask anyone because Xiaoying let go the guy before we started the game. When the game ended, he smiled: ‘Prove to be Mr. Isaac, the winner in the first try.’
‘You should known, the chess is not tougher than the western one. But I hope if it will be next time, you can be serious about playing with me.’
‘Oh? Why did you think I’m not serious, Mr. Isaac?’
‘Don’t take me for a fool, Xiaoying, I’m not, and so do you. And then, I just remembered I have told you I don’t like to see you acting, right?’
‘Yes, sir, I will remember it.’
‘You had better to do so. Now, just take me back to my room, I cannot bear to stay in the air anymore.’


Trust me, their Tiger Conservation Center would be the sickest scene you never ever seen before. Yeah, no one there was vomiting, but no one can feel well in there. Tigers lay down together, sleeping or be asleep. I didn’t know why the children could scream when they saw the tigers. A hare would be more horrible than those guys. And about they could keep operate, it really made me feel inconceivable.
‘Mr. Isaac, what you thinking about the center?’ The day we went there with the visitors, only Xiaoying and me, we had to dress as the visitor, he gave a foolish hat and sunglasses to me to block the sun.
‘Many big fat cats are lying together.’ Side I, ‘It looks so sick.’
‘Actually, that just what they are. They are the feline livestock.’
I stared at him behind the sunglasses, but he looked back at me smilingly, and I noticed his almond eyes in the sun would become brown, or just because the sunglasses? Whatever he was, I thought that was the secret they could keep live in the age. And, it also would be the one of the reasons I didn’t like Asia.
‘Okay, that’s enough.’ I took out the sunglasses, but his eyes didn’t go into black. ‘I want to go back.’
‘But you don’t see the feeding show yet.’ Even though he said as this, he took over the sunglasses, and turned the face back.
‘Well, I think your boss won’t anger with this. And I really wouldn’t like to see those guys eat anything. You don’t want me vomit right here. Do you?’
‘No, sir.’ said he, still smiling.


Those nights I stayed there were too sultry for me. Going there in summer was a fault, I knew, but because I stayed in the mountain so it wasn’t that bad, I sometime can went out still. The balcony of my room was big but there wasn’t any pretty scenery, at least in my eyes. However I liked there for the early-morning, and I always stood in balcony waiting my servants knock my door to wake me up. There was quite silent when the morning the sun just climbed the other side of mountain. Every sound whether it was loud or not would be very clearly in that time.
‘Wow, so surprising, John, call me in your working time?’
I rested on the railing holding the cell-phone between head and shoulder by the neck, and looked down the railing. Pretty green, but also boring.
‘Okay, I’m sorry I forgot to call you before this, but don’t kidding me, I has been apologetic. Forgive me. Alright, return from the digression, Isaac, did you have a good holiday there?’
‘Not really terrible as I guessed, but there is an impolite guy around me all the time.’
‘Oh, really?’
‘Yeah, he is my interpreter and guide. But it is not the point. I have seen their factories and the working report. You should came with me, do you know, I saw their tiger-bone medicated wines’ factory and Tiger Conservation Center. And guess what, they got the national burglarproof label of tiger-bone medicated wine.’
‘I’m not surprised, anyhow their center has passed the national authentication.’
‘Right, they really have the competent, my guide just told me China has joined the CITES since 1981, and the prohibition of exchanging the tigers’ bone issued in 1993. How a long time, isn’t? But they still have a hot market exchange the tigers. Fur, bone, meat… Chinese always surprise me.’
‘You know, in such country like China always has the best market.’
‘Uh-huh, so, do you want to finish here?’
‘Not yet, and according your saying, I think it will live for a long time.’
‘Well, they have this value. Then, can I come back tomorrow? And next time you need someone to go to the distant place work for me, don’t ask me again. Maybe you can ask Bob.’
‘OK. And for my apology to you, I will ask them to pick up you by our personal aircraft.’
‘Finally. I think I may forgive you.’ I hang up the cell-phone and went to answer the door. I was ready to tell these almond eyes I would like to say goodbye to them.




notes:
Hu Xiaoying=虎肖英
CITES=Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species of Wild Fauna and Flora 華盛頓公約

Finally, thanks for Cent provided the title.

標籤： 布幕之後。

The sunshine crossed the lattice and downed into his cover, where he hid and cried, there wasn't really dark enough for him to feel safe so he couldn't stop dropping the waters on his bed. But they wouldn't come here and see him. Wouldn't be so fast at least.
It was afternoon, the other children should all out the door playing at the grass or sitting at the tree shade. He covered up his eyes, the noise out to the lattice sounded too far and far, he couldn't be sure that they were in the same world still. Everybody were in the sunshine only I am not; I face away from the sun, I'm in the shadow. He thought, wiping the tears again and again.
However, he got wrong. There weren't only he boy in the shadow, the other one just closed the bedroom door. Very slowly and lightly. But he didn't saw him at all.

We can start a new life. Just you and me.
We can go somewhere no one else know and no one else will find out us taking us bake here. I know the way which can take us away here and they won't notice that before we get to the place million miles far. We will disappear like we evaporate in the sun. They won't catch us.
I promise.

It was late summer, and the weather wasn't start to be cool and everything was bright and vitality, almost everything. He lifted a hand to block sunlight and narrowed eyes when he walked up on the stairs. He didn't like summer. It always made him thought about his dad. The shining and bright hair, the shining and bright and foolish smiles of the shining and bright and foolish and best Dad, his father, his only family. They went to the seashore near their old house hand in hand every summer in the past when he was a kid. Dad always told him summer is the best season and it also is their season because they both be born in summer. But Dad also gone in summer.
Thus, he couldn't like summer any more. It brought the world to him but took them away too.
Therefore, everything happened in summer wouldn't be the good luck for him. He thought.
The door of president's office was near enough for him to touched.
He knocked, and trembled slightly.

Stretch out your hands, follow me.

"Don't be strained, we don't think that was you, we just want to know the reason."
"......but it wasn't me, sir."
"Oh, no no no, don't be that scared, my boy. You can tell me the truth, we will all forgive you. Won't we?"
"Yes, I know, sir, but it really wasn't me, I can't give you any reason."
"Oh, maybe you don't get the point. Look, boy, Mr. Taheri won't mind your little mistake at all, nothing will be change, such a kind man Mr. Taheri is. Isn't he, eh?"
"......"
"Okay, don't worry, I got it, you don't want to let him know that, right? Maybe we can tell nothing to him, sure, we can. Now, you just give a reason to me. Was it about your school, eh? But Mr. Taheri is a millioniar, he can takes you to any school you want, and he will, I am sure. Maybe you didn't really know that. I know. It wasn't all your fault. I really understand......"
No, you don't. He shouted in mind and nearly crying. But he only could keep silent.
No one would got a good result they wanted in this meeting, he knew, and so did the other shadow-boy. Thus, he just waited, waited behind the office wall.

Please, please follow me. We can ran away from all.
Trust me.

He walked on the wooded path in the manor, this asylum might be the holding of landlord who had the rank in the past, whatever, they owned a pretty garden with the same-like wooded path. He walked, and saw some leaves' edge were getting faded. For goodness' sake, they are being dead, and summer may be died down, too. He thought, while the wind was blowing across the woods. He felt he sky was quite clear and sunshine was really genial.
Did it sign the summer is gone, did it sign everything is go away, and did it sign the bad luck will be end?
He asked in mind and narrowed eyes, under the sun.

"So, got the answer, eh?" the Shadow Boy went up to him from the hide of the trees when he went back. It looked like he had been waited for him there.
He nodded. "Maybe you're right. I cannot stay here any more."
"You, and me. We both can't stay here, no one should be held by them, especially we." said that boy.
"So, when will we go away, as you promised?"
"Now," said Shadow Boy, smiling. "as I promise."

Maybe it meant the autumn, the new start.
He thought, when they crossed the gate of the asylum, to the new life, with his new family.



100-48

New words cover the old idea, right?

標籤： 布幕之後。

act.1
他按著傷口跌跌撞撞地從門外走進來，而你只是坐在地上看著這一幕。 那雙大眼睛發現你之後瞪地更加渾圓突出，然後猛地低頭，儘量用最快的速度一瘸一瘸地跑進房間裡。你一點也不意外。羞恥，憤怒，恐懼，你看著他佈滿血絲的眼睛、淌血的嘴角、瘀腫的眼框、因為拉扯而變形的衣袖、從領口露出一片擦傷的鎖骨，它們用盡一切在向你敘述究竟是什麼樣的事情在你視野觸及不到的地方發生了。也許，你心不在焉地想著，他連自己的事情也知道了。──那麼他一定會更加討厭自己吧。

act.2
你看著他從那條晦暗的巷子中走出來，不就前洗劫來的東西全都自手心消失了。那的確是個藏匿人的好地點，早該想到了，你自我檢討著。但，「你不覺得我們家的地下室會更安全嗎？」你問到。不出所料，他滿臉猙獰驚訝地看向你，好一會兒才擠出了一句：「媽媽不回答應的，那傢伙也是。」你點頭表示了解。但實際上你覺得以他的能力而言，要說服他們甚至直接偷渡肯定都不是問題。「還有，」離開前他向你這麼補充道，滿臉警戒，那雙眼睛看起來惡狠狠又小心翼翼。「你不要再來這裡了。」說完，下一秒他便隱沒進另一條暗巷不見蹤影。

act.3
你一開始並不打算窺探任何事，那是因為他和那個人實在太大意了，這麼大剌剌地出現在街道上。不得不承認，這回你真的有些驚訝了。自從他那天傷痕累累的逃回家後你以為往後大概不可能再遇上這種情形了，但你估錯了。
你開始好奇那傢伙的來頭。

act.4
你在那裡等待著，那個傢伙果真如願出現。 確實，打架並非你的強項，但是只要掌握技巧加上適度的勁道，成果不容小覷。可你似乎只要碰上有關他的事情失算率就會提高。對方再怎麼說也不是路邊混混的等級。他就在你被打到重心不穩的那一刻出現。他的出現阻止了後續的可能發展，你捕捉到了他臉上一閃而逝的訝異，但接著是他濃縮了不解和戒備的神情。「別管他了，我們走吧。」他說那句的時候眼神是停留在你身上，不過最後他終究一句話也沒對你說。你無法移動四肢，只好闔上雙眼聽著他們離開的腳步聲。

他走了。(接著你回想起，或許你早就料到了這天終將會到來。)

標籤： 布幕之後。

Natale (Christmas)


斯夸羅是在羅馬尼亞出生的。

不過他對於這個故鄉的印象已經被歲月消磨殆盡，剩下課本中概略而客氣的文字，就算圖書館架上那些描寫入裏的說明也不夠細微足以勾起他對那塊土地殘破不堪的熟悉感。僅僅在義大利的夏天幾個特別炎熱的日子裡和聖誕節的時候，那個如水中的魅影般搖晃模糊不清的畫面才會離開遭時光塵埃掩埋至地底的街道。


迪諾曾經問他，羅馬尼亞是否真的是個美麗的地方，斯夸羅只是哼了聲將書脊壓到桌面上，告訴他，那些彩色印刷的照片就算標上名稱他也指認不出是個甚麼模樣。 他不明白迪諾是從何得知這個消息的，但是每天都有各式各樣的流言在走廊間傳播，遠勝過其他什勞子的中學，不過斯夸羅本來就是衝此而來，他不在乎，況且在這麼龐雜的小道資訊中就算有個一兩條是真如其事也不奇怪。再說這也只是條無傷大雅的花邊消息，一個已經被對當時的他而言彌足漫長的時間隔絕在後的故土，除了若有似無的一些倒影外根本甚麼也不剩。


剛認識迪諾的時候，斯夸羅只覺得他是個說沒用也不是最沒用、說有來頭卻又不是多有來頭的小家族的下一代繼承人。然後還是個容易淪為被欺負對項的滑稽角色。不過等到他們相識一段時間後，他才注意到原來迪諾身上每日更新大大小小的繃帶包紮不僅僅是受欺負之下的產物，還有來自於異於常人的笨拙。
還有，他也發現到這個看似沒用廢物的傢伙確實是個黑手黨家族的繼承人。儘管他總是在學校哪個階梯上不期而遇他摔地狼狽的身影──不管是外在還是內部因素──以及他那乾巴巴地笑容：嗨，斯夸羅。


忘記是哪年的一月七日，在他經過校門的時候碰到又渾身散發藥水味的迪諾，他幾乎不需要思考就能知道不久前迪諾大概又因為什麼理由和那群傢伙幹架然後被丟到廚旁後方的垃圾桶渾身擦傷。然而迪諾在他開口之前就先說了話。儘管沒有特別去回想，但是他卻始終沒有忘記那天迪諾曖曖的語調。

啊，斯夸羅，聖誕快樂。

那時是否有甚麼不輕不重的東西從撒夸羅的身上滑落悶悶地跌到了地上他不知道，他先是愣了一下，發覺自己無法辨識那個在那一刻衝到喉際的音節之後，索性就讓它氣若游絲地隨鼻息散逸到空中，改問他這傢伙是不是這回真的被打中大腦要害了。 怪了，我應該沒有記錯才對，東正教的聖誕節是一月七日吧？這是他得到的回答。他不記得自己究竟說了甚麼話，只記得後來臨走前他對迪諾說他的包紮技術真是亂七八糟，受了這麼多年的傷竟然連這點也不會長進。


窗外的濛濛細雨與有空調設備的圖書館讓窗戶起了層薄薄的水氣，斯夸羅當時只是剛好闔上那本他覺得很顯然是選錯本書的精裝文獻，百無聊賴之下，他隨手便翻開被上個學生遺留在旁那本黑色封皮的書。或許是巧合還是甚麼，當時斯夸羅是這麼認為的，但是後想想那是因為他根本沒有去留意書名便攤開書頁的關係，但看到那個熟悉的字跳入眼簾他的手還是稍微停頓了一下。

羅馬尼亞。

他盯著那個字半晌又隨便翻了幾頁才蓋上書，連同他先前拿的精裝本放回架上。


離開前他注意到窗外一陣吵鬧的聲音，幾個辨識度高的嗓音，他毫不懷疑雨甚麼的對於那些會拿口紅在法拉利的擋風玻璃上塗鴉的傢伙根本毫無阻擋作用。他在前往醫護室的路上順便從被雨水模糊清晰度的玻璃窗看了幾眼那幾個在河道旁笑成一團的人，發現灰濛濛的運河上行駛的船隻比前幾天少了部分。

斯夸羅走進醫務室的時候一個女孩子正好在與校醫交談，於是他甚麼也沒說，拿走了架上備有的幾條白毛巾的其中之一。看著他進出那個操著東歐口音的校醫對此沒置一詞。不過一直到那天聽著平時甚少開口的校醫和個女學生滔滔不絕的交談，斯夸羅才驀然想起或許這就是祂並不討厭醫務室的原因。

他將毛巾批在肩膀上，在附近的傘架隨手拿了一把就沿著圖書館外部的圍牆遠離校門。他看著溫吞的河面載沉載浮，難以辨明的混濁色澤，不時有中央的船隻經過江河面下的塵埃翻騰至水面。
接著，他就看到了，迪諾一隻手貼在路面上，乍看之下一如遭人丟棄滅跡的屍體。那副模樣如今回想斯夸羅還是覺得要算他看過迪諾學生時期最慘不忍睹地落魄樣子之一，要不是那天他伸手將這個已經虛脫無力的家夥拉起，也許今天的加百羅涅只能每年在此時對著運河回想那具浮腫的先繼承人暗自飲泣，阿爾巴雷諾也必須延後向世人展現他們在教育方面有不輸殺人藝術的本領。

「你這家伙，多少將來也會是首領級的人物。」斯夸羅說著鬆開那濕答答的衣袖，迪諾只是又展現了乾巴巴的笑容向他道謝。

後來斯夸羅將毛巾丟給那個比雨還溼的少年，看著他努力擰乾自己的衣服，才注意那些濺到自己的襯衫上的河水很冰冷，裸露在西風中握著傘柄的手指也逐漸發僵。

冬天來了。在他攙著迪諾回學校前，他看著這個溼漉漉的城市想到。

標籤： 布幕之後。

那年夏天結束的那一天，他們一起站在庭院裡，望著枝稍上那個空著的鳥巢，不斷有葉子在他們身旁輕輕跌落，漸漸乾枯的草也在扭怩不安的皮鞋下沙沙作響。秋天要來了呢，媽媽說過，秋天的陽光是最溫柔的。她輕輕地說著，低下頭，看著陽光穿過稀疏的枝葉散亂在她的腳邊。他們明年就會回來了，要是哭的話艾瑟克就對不起他們了，也對不起秋天。一旁的男孩依舊仰著頭看向樹梢，他呢喃似的說道。什麼話，我才不會哭呢，艾瑟絲妳才不可以哭。

西風打亂了他們的髮際，午後的秋陽讓庭院中撩動的湖水變成燦金色的，耀眼逼人，就像是哪個童話一樣。 恍惚中，艾瑟絲記得自己轉頭看向那波光粼粼湖面，一片燦爛裡倒映不出他們的身影。

就是這麼燦爛的陽光帶走母親的，那麼喜歡秋陽的母親。

她閉上眼睛，被光扎人的痛刺激得流出眼淚。

標籤： 布幕之後。

軸心: 臣服。(Cent提供)



la pioggia prima dell'eliminazione del sin
(the Rain before Eliminating Sin)



雨密密斜斜地打在窗框上，濺起清脆的聲響絲絲縷縷羅織成了網，橫空障敝了窗裡和窗外的世界。一道道的水痕沿著玻璃緩緩冗流，滑下，再滑下，他坐在床頭看著，反覆之間，他突然想不起那灰濛濛的窗外究竟又是哪一個城市，一直到那陣細微卻嘹喨的呼喚響起為止。 昨天的衣服散落在床尾和地板上，他伸手摸索枕頭旁邊，手機卻已經被安安穩穩的放在床頭櫃上。他想不起電燈的開關在哪裡，索性就著窗外稀微的日光和手機本身的光芒看起訊息。

等到他把手機重新放回櫃子上時，他看著滿窗的雨聲才忽然想起，冬天似乎也快來了。


「我做了早餐，想要吃嗎？」 看著他一手壓著亂翹的頭髮從浴室裡走出來時，她不疾不徐地迎上前去，手臂裡掛著的是從房間裡收拾來的衣服。

「當然好。」嘴角的肌肉運動牽動了眼角的線條，他微笑著親吻她的額頭。「對了，我的衣服……」

「不用擔心，我衣櫥裡還有很多套。」她吸氣吐氣陰影在低衣領露出的鎖骨上浮動，微笑時顫動的睫毛像是隨著雨聲跳躍，他突然忘記時上次見面時她的頭髮是什麼味道，薄荷？香草？還是其他的什麼？ 那些櫥窗裡的商標突然像某種磨損幻燈片一樣遙遠。

餐廳的採光估計是公寓裡最好的，因為她並沒有開燈。桌上有兩人份的早餐，他還在某個咖啡杯的旁邊發現了奶精和糖，報紙和嶄新的菸盒，還有咖啡壺。 他輕啜了一口杯裡咖啡，味道太淡了一點，然後看著旁邊壺裡的咖啡反光著一種濃稠的色澤，回想起自己過去似乎比較喜歡兩匙塘的拿鐵。等她回到餐廳時，他注意到她收拾那些他並沒有用上的東西時，帶著方才在走廊裡的微笑。

「打算什麼時候走呢？」他拿著叉子的手經常不經意蹭到報紙，於是她把桌子對面的那份報紙拿到自己身前，看著冷冷的陽光照在頭版的標題上，他看著對方低著頭說話時雙眼隨著那些鉛字游移著，開始回想自己上次看報紙究竟是多久以前的事情了。

「今天早上有來電，下午要會合，晚上就要離開這個國家了。」

「這樣啊。」她回答時依舊沒有抬頭。

「對了，先前的手機號碼我不用了。這次的工作結束之後我再給你我的新號碼。因為這次的生意內容比之前的複雜一點。」

她嗯的一聲點了點頭，儘管他心裡明白自己的來電紀錄裡從未出現過她的號碼，但是他也很明白規矩。硬要在現實裡做夢不會有什麼好結果的。

「我已經幫你挑好了一套西裝放在床頭上，離開時記得鎖好門。我要去上班了。」她把餐盤端回廚房流理台，他點了點頭繼續啜飲那杯已經涼掉的咖啡。

他在餐廳的門口就能看見她在門廊那端穿上外衣找尋傘的身影，他趕緊拿起一旁餐巾指偕偕嘴，拖拉著從她衣櫃裡摸索出來已經退色的自己的長褲走到門口送行。其實他有看到對方雖然已經整裝完畢，但依舊在門口停頓了一下，於是他的雙臂及時趕上摟住她的肩頭。

她伸手回摟他的手臂，或許是因為今天的天氣比較冷吧，他總覺得對方的掌心很炙熱。

「吶，掰掰，路上小心喔。」

「你也是。」

他低下頭，隔著她暗紅的髮絲看見她抱著他的食指上有一枚小小的戒指。

他闔上眼睛，腦中浮現的卻是他的手機還放在床頭的畫片。 「對不起。」

「不用說對不起。」她的聲音很小，近乎呢喃。

標籤： 布幕之後。

The vast whiteness surround us, I cannot make out the sky-line in it, maybe we stand at the sky and the land is above our head, but we never can get a clear understanding of this.

“Hey, what are you thinking now?”
“Huh?” I strain the neckline, the frost on my lips nearly seals my mouth. I just spoken a syllable, but I think there was more than half heat be loss from the word.
“You ever said that you want to go somewhere to see the snow, remember?” I nod lightly. I am not anticipate that he still remember this. “Well, the dream comes true, so how do you think about...” he shakes his arms to show the scenery. “...this?”

“Um... so cold?”

First he is stupefied, and then he laughs heartily.


“.... good guy. How about we go here next time?”
“Sounds not bad.” I shrug.


100-81

標籤： 布幕之後。

最後他是說怎麼辦怎麼辦怎麼辦，然後一副快要哭的表情。而你知道，那從來都不是疑問句。

那個人一輩子都不會哭的才對，你是這麼想的，就算哪天留了眼淚你也永遠不會知道不會看到就算真撞見了也不會跟你有任何關聯；總之，他一輩子都不會真正的哭，對你而言真正的哭。 那是因為你們之間其實什麼也不是。你是這樣想的。最多不過就是同班同學而已。 然後坦白說吧，其實這樣也的確什麼也不是，如果這真的擁有字面上的意義，頂多就是零而已，頂多就是象徵擁有彼此相關局面的零而已。而且不會有新增的數值了。你一直是這樣想著的。

可是你就是一直轉過頭去看他。

就算裝傻去詢問自己幹麻要這個樣子啊也不會改變既定的事實，有的時候你好像就這樣一直看下去甚至忘記要眨眼睛，是不是連你的運作中樞對對這一切有著成癮一樣的依賴你也不知道。但是，但是但是，這也不會代表什麼對吧。何況雖然你無法控制自己的雙眼，事實上也再沒有其他的了。就算他的座位因為你無法得知的原因空缺著，你也不會覺得寂寞，畢竟本來就是不同生活範圍的人，最多也只是雙眼失焦時那個空位特別刺目爾爾。你們的世界靠近或許平行，就是從來不曾重疊過，而你，不過是在那些個間歇零碎的空白時光裡偷偷望向著另一個世界裡的對方。所以一直以來都是這樣的，那麼也沒有什麼道理必須改變。

不僅僅是你，誰都會這樣想的。

任誰都會覺得日子會這樣被你們大把大把的揮灑，用相同的角度相同的姿勢，直到分離不得不到來為止。

可是偏偏那個人啊，那個人就是要像所有吸引人不管是眼睛還是心還是其他什麼的一樣，非得做出平凡如你的人永遠不會做的事情出來。好比說，就這樣隨隨便便打碎世界的常規，好比說，不在乎空間的問題，直接把宇宙的間距踢到一邊去，好比說，那麼任性那麼瀟灑那麼讓人哭笑不得，好像理所當然一樣。

那天，他在放學時分的火紅落日裡向你走來。就像所有的夢境一樣。只是這次沒有人會醒來。
或許是因為那個夕陽實在巨大的太不可思議了，把往日熟悉的街道扭曲成了另個時空也說不定，太陽好大好紅好亮好刺眼，可是你的眼睛卻不乾不澀似的直盯著對方走向你的身影。小小小到另個世界的宇宙裡，然後大大大到你觸手可及的次元中。他背光，所以直到你們定格在彼此的瞳孔中之前，你都沒看清楚他的臉。

我們快要畢業了呢。 他對你說，輕喊你的名字最後還加了敬稱。

是啊。 你回應。沒有結巴沒有停頓沒有震耳欲聾的心跳什麼也沒有。這一定是夢，你隔著一層厚重的水幕想著，要不然就是異世界。

那我們以後要怎麼辦呢？ 你看到他的眼角在微笑可是瞳孔沒有笑，但是那都不重要了，因為他的臉在夕陽下被灼得比平時更加深深令人泯湎，你就快在那被光影雕琢地讓人不住驚嘆的輪廓下滅頂了，就算他的眼睛一點光也沒有就已經比罌粟還美還美，所以誰計較呢。

怎麼辦？什麼怎麼辦？ 你以為自己會說不出話來，快溺斃之前怎麼可能會說話呢，可是你還是說了，就像不用受大腦指揮。

但接著你就看到了。

那雙眼睛在一次的眨動後倒印滿滿的波光粼粼，燙的像夕陽紅的像夕陽耀眼的也像夕陽。就像之前說的，你一直以為你這輩子都不會看到他哭了，不只是哭連笑連生氣連無奈連賭氣連其他很多很多你數也數不完的，都應該不會看到才對。你真的以為他都不會哭的才對。你更篤定自己在作夢了。

像是為了呼應，他真的就像那些劇本寫的一樣拉住了你的衣服下襬，你都還沒有打算要走，但是但是他可能可以知道一些你都不知道的劇情暗示。

他說，怎麼辦呢我們，怎麼辦怎麼辦怎麼辦？最後他說。

而你終於沉默了。

到底那些打轉的東西是有滑下去還是被他粗魯的抹掉你根本就不知道，雖然你可以想像他手掌和指節的動作多麼優雅多麼帥氣多麼另人窒息，但是你什麼也沒看到，當然，你都背向他狼狽地逃跑了，還能看到什麼。 你沒有後悔，就算後悔過也在一瞬間被消融的一乾二淨了。因為你非常明白，本來就是這樣子才對，如果他非要脫稿演出的話，那麼你就必需在適當的時機作出適當的臨場反應。況且到頭來的結局也是寫好的了你們才開始上演這齣戲劇的，就算對方才華洋溢能在中段自己飾出完全不同的戲碼，可是最後的結局也不能因此改寫。這樣才是最好的，你一點也不後悔，你不後悔自己逃跑了。

況且你很清楚，從頭到尾，那些從來都不是疑問句。標點符號只是免強支持住你們的幌子罷了。

然後然後，再也沒有然後了。

只是你偶而會想，再來一遍，再來一遍的話，你一定要等那些東西從他的下巴滴落到自己掌心後再轉身，起碼要真正真正，真正看到了，看到了一次再轉身。當然，你也清楚，永遠不會再來一遍了，而你對夕陽的過敏也永遠不會治好了。

標籤： 布幕之後。

行行好，可憐可憐我。

他的衣服即使襤褸，卻也足夠暴露他的身分。此地的異鄉人。我看著他，站在我面前，全身被旅途的疲憊淹沒，骯髒的，狼狽的，只剩下那雙灰色的眼睛擁有色彩。很深。很沉。很刺眼。我停下，無法再往前。
我被那雙眼睛蠱惑。他們在鼓勵我。

我走上前，伸出手，把指尖深入那糾結看不出原本髮色的瀏海裡。
海鹽，泥土，還有雨水跟草屑。

──他們曾經說過的話:「你無法回去的，大海太遼闊了，你有翅膀嗎? 你游得回去嗎? 別泛傻了。」

那一霎那，我幾乎發狂。
我使盡扯著他的衣袖，不理會他驚惶的叫喊。那是我的土地嗎? 那是我的天空嗎? 那是我的大海嗎? 那是嗎? 那裏仍舊很美麗吧? 你怎麼來的? 我怎麼回去?

最後我在銅板落下的叮噹聲中放聲大哭。

──我甚麼都給你，告訴我怎麼回去吧，求求你。



戰間期X+84題: 鄉

標籤： 布幕之後。

You kissed me goodbye.
I didn’t say anything, but you told me there is something we have both known will be enough, so we don’t need each other even language. Right. Maybe you’re right.
Please say yes because I am always right to you.
You smiled disorderly, which was pretty shine somehow, it made me have to close my eyes until you left.

That is the last time I can hear you call and see the most radiant smile to myself. Ah-YES, you left and will never bake; yes, i see, and i didn’t need any other to tell me what you said. Yes.



The day is cloudy with the strong wind. I walk along this empty street as dark and dead, they made it looks like death or dream. The wind mop paving, and the gutter cries aloud by the street, I have never seen each other since I walked on the road which only I ever known, my shadow is the only one beside me.
I feel the world is sleeping and I don’t know why he become that after you want away, maybe you can tell me why; anything if you say will be the true to me as you ever said, so I wish you will come back and talk to me.
But also as you said, we have both known.


So I sill walk alone on the lonely street, till one day you come to find me, and say an “Ave” there for me.

Then I will be dead, as dead I well may be.



　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　──Breathless aria


I don't know why I wrote it for. I just want to try it.
I hope someone can tell me the mistakes of the writing after reading the article, I have known my English is very terrible.
The topic's source: 102° East

標籤： 布幕之後。

He heard someone call from the dark, every times when he was alone.


"No, my boy, here was only you and me."Mum. Mummy. She told him with a soft voice and an embrace, her golden hair obstructed his view as a dream, he could feel nothing except for her. "Don't be afraid, my boy, if I am here then no one can harm you, and I will always beside you. So don't be afraid, my boy..." she said, just like singing.

He nodded with a yawn. "...yes, mummy, yes."

"Good boy, that's Mummy's boy." she kissed his brow good night.


"Have a brilliant dream, my ducky."



maybe the boy is Chris of TPR(Temperature, Pulse And Respiration)
they have the same breath

標籤： 布幕之後。

炙熱禁錮我的指尖，他們糾結在一快無聲地哀嚎。亞麻的罩衫擋住了所有去路，我吃力的仰望藍得不顧一切的天空，把下巴抵在壓得隱隱作痛的鎖骨。在汗水躺到眼簾前拚命眨著眼。
日升日落。
我們手臂相疊，化塵為水。
在漫天黃沙中。

標籤： 布幕之後。

剛想要張口結果卻忘記了想要說什麼，旋律蛇行在腦海中，雪地裡的黑森林就像推開窗戶後不存在的冷冽霜風。早餐的黑咖啡躲在晨光照耀不到的地方獨自閃爍，伴隨上菜的是一份過期的報紙，泛黃的紙邊清柔得像是某首遺落名稱的童謠。她倚在清晨窗邊，指間是不屬於這個季節的空氣，她看著遠方的森林，緩慢地忘記要眨眼睛。
早晨起來，她想起昨夜做了一個夢。她在想念。

標籤： 布幕之後。